Can I Make 25 Crates in 8 Hours ?
Articles Blog

Can I Make 25 Crates in 8 Hours ?

March 4, 2020

I’m Tim Berland from Whoville welcome ladies and gentlemen I am
Tim Berland your host today coming to you live from a random garage in
Braddock Hills Pennsylvania here with my esteemed colleague D Walt, D glad to have
you here my pleasure to be here with you Tim I’m so glad you sobered up for this well
the always bringing the jokes we have a lively event here for you today where
the ever unpopular John Malecki will try to not die of dehydration while building
25 boxes in a single work day the drunken idiots that are all over the
tri-state area have been here since the crack of dawn looking for any excuse
they can to get wild let’s take it outside to see how some of them are
doing oh my never be able to unsee that I don’t think my can’t either deep
before we cut it into the action we’re gonna take it on down the locker room
and give you a little pregame speech all right boys listen up you sorry sacks of
horse manure, this is the big league we got the call it’s game day I want you to
get out there and build like your lives depend on it
25 boxes one day CAN YOU HANDLE IT! I CAN’T HEAR YOU JOHNSTON. Who the hell is Johnston. I have no clue….. it’s moments like this the champions are made these
opportunities present themselves once in a lifetime you tell your kids about them
you’re telling your kid kids if you’re lucky don’t let her put you off camera
keeps his head do not take your eye off the prize when you’re on the battlefield
today boys if will be hard and will be hot it will
be sweaty it will be gruesome but just know I lost my train of thought. BUT JUST GET OUT THERE AND WHIP SOME ASS! NOW GO GET EM! well that got weird
quick almost as weird as that dodgeball game we did Mexico oh yeah my
mustache still smells. and I just got word John is now ready to enter the
arena he is gearing up with one of his classic pregame rituals in one of his
hometown heroes Christina Aguilera’s pregame playlist let’s take it out to
the tunnel and we’re off it seems John’s got the
belly out already hit the gym big fella he’s struggling to
throw around this four by eight sheet of 3/4 inch plywood which could be a
problem down the line he seems to be a hyper focused and ooh intelligently has
set himself up with some saw horses right next to him which is right next that is a smart that is a
bold move D, what do you think I think you smell like malt liquor you’re
all-rookie move dropping the tape measure but you guys could tell John is full of
emotion here for this build this seems to be something he is thoroughly
enjoying already and we’re only in the first three minutes haha you’re screwed
big guy John seems to be revving up there with
whatever he’s listening to in those overpriced headphones my guess would be
something from the mid to late 90s and like I said like a fat kid in camp
he is sweating profusely now stay hydrated children if you’re
watching this because you could die it looks like in prevention of the extreme
heat in the shop John has actually went out and got some fans now these are
potentially his only fans I am they are bellowing rapidly trying to keep him
cool if you guys were not aware it is at least 100 degrees in the shop today we
all know John went to the University of Pittsburgh and potentially his
mathematical acuity is not very high well it finally seems like all of those
long strips of plywood have been ripped down and now he’s moving over to
struggling with his crosscut sled this is a new addition to the shop John
hasn’t been using very often because uh he’s not actually that good of a
woodworker now D what do you think about this technique here of how he’s drinking
his water I found it much more efficient to lean down into a babbling brook to
drink water uh yes Dee I think if all of us could we’d Bend our pretty little
noses down to the creek and lick the water out of it gently as it looks from
here exhaustion is beginning to set in we all know John no longer trains for
sports because he’s he’s a washed-up athlete and he seems to be getting tired
let’s let’s see if he makes any mistakes oh it looks like John is calling him his
old friend Cartan Brodeur from the likes of what we think is
french-canadian John’s most people love it country and oh look at how adorable
it is they’ve been they’ve been seeing each other on and off for about eight
months now and it’s great to see Cartan back in it, what a beautiful reunion so
it seems now as it typically is Cartan is putting the team on his back so from
what it seems John actually forgot to cut one of the pieces like I said he
can’t do math so now he’s making up for his mistake this could cost him on the
backend as far as time goes the Timberland pro is actually celebrating
their 20th anniversary which is a fantastic milestone and with that
they’ve released some awesome new apparel which they’ll be sending out to
makers all over the woodworking community if you’re one of the
individuals who happens to get a box just make sure you throw it directly
into the trash because we know John only makes trash I wonder if this material will be the mysterious northern white pine. I HATE WHITE PINE. MY DADDY DIED IN A FOREST OF WHITE PINE. I’m sorry to hear that your father died in the forest
of white pine D. Wow looks like John’s back at the water cooler again because
he continues to be extremely out of shape now that he’s back on to the table
saw here let’s see what he’s going to do with these pine boards seems like we’re
gonna be here for a while ladies and gentlemen. he has a dozen of these
boards looks like he’s ripping them into tiny strips d if you need to you could
take that potty break you’ve been asking me for for the last three and a half
hours no Tim you’re just trying to go drink in the parkin Lot again. you’re welcome.
well now we have what is called the D dust collection alarm system seems that
the dust collector is now full and John is completely ignoring it
because you want someone else to take care of it for him only problem is John
by himself today because we refused to purchase any help
fortunately we have a very very kind video guy here and he seems to be
sweeping up floor I really hope that this doesn’t slow him down because he
will definitely be missing that deadline of 5:00 p.m. in which he has to go to
his weight watchers appointment because that dude needs to go on a diet quick. we’re back in the shop
where John is blowing himself, off with the air compressor this is a classic Pro
move in order to keep yourself cool and keep the dust off of that wet sticky skin Jonah’s now batch cross-cutting all of
the pieces that will potentially be the framing for these boxes he’s labeling
them because his memory is shot after years of being a backup in sports
leagues and where he bashed his head into other people
for measly pennies I will give credit where credit is due and that is a pro
move using that backer they are in order to help alleviate and pressure on the
blade so that nothing kicks back and hits him in the face
seems like we’ve gotten to the monotony of the project in which John will be
taking hundreds of parts and assembling them into the boxes so we in the booth
beer are going to take what we used to call a “smoke break” but now because
everything’s PC and we’ve just got a call it a “break”. we’ll catch you in 5. “someone give
me a damn cigarette” and that ladies and gentlemen will conclude the first half
of this build we definitely don’t think John’s gonna make it then that ladies
and gentlemen will conclude the first half of this bill John needs to go take
a shower rehydrate potentially eat an entire Italian sub there’s a delicious
spot up the street actually D, if you want to go get one. Tim you know I’m on a strict vegan diet, don’t care if
you’re vegetarian, it’s very different god you’re so insensitive either way
enjoy the halftime show um well halftime was good hot do you
think you’d be able to finish this intense project? yeah, anything else? okay
yeah well uh seems that John is continually attempting to use his very
lacking skills of athleticism here look at the throw things in the trash not
doing too well for him just making more than this can’t wait to watch him clean
that up leader all right it looks like we’re fueled back up here with a little
bit of caffeine and potentially some of my grandfather’s syrup we’re having
ourselves a lively time in the shop John’s back in it for the same exact
shirt smells terrible but he’s getting back into the grind you just busted out
the nail gun he turned the compressor up and now we’re making some boxes what do
you think to D, I think you need to sober up and calm down. don’t tell me to
calm down D you don’t tell me to calm down it looks like we are finally onto the
stage in which is something is starting to resemble box thank God it seems like
what John is doing here is taking the parts that coincide as sides of the
boxes here and putting them together with just 18 gauge brad nails i wonder if
this idiot knows that that gun has bump mode interesting technique John seems to be
using their let’s get a replay of that last D, I do believe that you were named after
the brand of that nail gun? Well no Tim, I was named after my uncle Dennis. whom everyone called D. No D, you were not named after your great uncle D, you were named after D-Walt. NO I WASN’T, YOU LIAR. YOU DRUNK. The boxes seem to be
stacking up nicely the fans seem to still be working John still seems to
be sweating profusely and things are moving along nicely John has still yet to figure out that
that gun has bump mode why ladies and gentlemen it seems that John has finally figured
out that that gun actually does have bump mode and we are rocking and rolling
here with the ends of these carcasses. hey it seems like John’s really getting
these things coming together now D what do you think I think you smell like
cigarettes and coffee. I refuse to slow down on drinking those coffees well ladies and
gentlemen it’s I’m I’m getting out hot bother here seems that John has asked
his friend Sam Green “why the hell do you sound southern” it spits fire that shoots out parts amazingly out of
nothing Tim I think that’s called a plasma CNC D has just informed me it’s
called a plasma CnC. they really need to stop paying me more oh ma that thing is bea—–utiful looks
like he is taking that stencil and laying down some beautiful stenciling on
the outside of these boxes this seems to be the only thing that I find
intelligent about this entire battle as I final finish is going on these things
are really starting to come together D can you feel the excitement in the
room I don’t really care what you have to say cuz I’m excited this is gonna be
awesome so it’s coming down to the wire the
final box is getting sprayed oh my goodness can you feel the energy in the
room I can’t do this anymore people. and as you do with most builds John is now
stacking up all of the things that he made in order to take a stupid
photograph for Instagram so you guys so much for checking this
one out this one was a lot of fun a little bit different but if you want to
see some more craziness make sure you’re hitting the video I got linked up for
you right here I also want to thank Timberland pro for sponsoring this build
if you want to see their new fall lineup of clothes and boots I’ve got that link
down in the description and lastly thank you one more time for tuning in and
don’t forget to stay hydrated while you go punch a nice project in the face

Only registered users can comment.

  1. Thanks for taking your projects seriously, Not you tube.
    Hilarious crossover parody Intro and "coverage".
    Or was it inadvertent overdose of Black Rifle?

  2. I can say this is not my favorite format but love the build. thank you for sharing and giving me an idea on what I can do.

  3. Maybe it is just me and it probably is but couldn't even make it to the half way point… Want to watch build videos when I come here… This was just to much… Sorry John.

  4. Tony D'Amato: “On this team we fight for that inch-“

    John: “It will be hard, it will be hot, it will be sweaty, it will be gruesome…”

    Everybody on the team: sweating profusely

  5. Nah, skipping this one. Let me know if this is a new format or something. Call me a hater, call me a troll. I signed up to watch you build stuff. This is fucking garbage.

  6. Okay what the f*** did I just watch that is about the most messed up nonsense I've ever seen really all I can say is wow maybe stick to just woodworking this was so stupid

  7. Hahaha this is awesome, It’s nice to see something different. John is a fun guy!! I would love to have a beer 🍺 with him

  8. Man the negativity on this one. I thought it was great for what it was. A video about batching out a bunch of boxes. Keep it up and take the advice of the great philosopher 50 Cent when he said " If they hate then let em hate, and watch the money pile up." In this case you could replace money with boxes. Good work.

  9. You’re getting some hate in the comments because of the different format. But I enjoyed the change. I also very much appreciate how much hard work goes in to filming something like this, especially while also trying to build 25 boxes! Good job going out of your comfort zone and trying something new and fun.

  10. Totally do not like this new format. Now I dare you to take the Physical Challenge to cut the nonsense. Cannot do it❓ Do a 1 minute project. Are you ready❓ On your mark, Get Set, GO!

  11. Don’t listen to these 90 year old guys. They’ll be gone in a few years and won’t be able to smash their old ladies or a thumbs up button! Lol keep it up!

  12. I found this to be pretty funny! Cause really how else can you make, making a box a fun video to watch! Well done John 👊🏽

  13. This was a great video to break up the monotony of project videos but using compressed air to clean yourself is dangerous and so is nailing without safety goggles. Other than that I wouldn't mind one of these once in a while or a skit at the beginning like demolitionranch

  14. People are saying they don’t like this video but man this is awesome! So cringeworthy and unexpected. Creative in a weird way

  15. HA! This was fantastic, and since I am watching this out of order, I can say it's not the new norm, but oofta is it entertaining! Love your channel. And SO glad you/he found 'bump mode'!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *