Donkey Kong 64 – EP 6: Barrel Blast!
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Donkey Kong 64 – EP 6: Barrel Blast!

November 4, 2019

Matt: *coughing* Ryan: We’re here now, and I wish I just kept with Diddy cuz he’s got so many banana- you know, I’m gonna go is Matt: Gonna go back and get a little Diddy? Ryan: I’m gonna go back and get Diddy unless there’s a barrel here, I don’t see no- Matt: Little diddle Ryan: Give me Diddy or-
Both: give me death! Matt: *giggles* Ryan: Hey look! You and I are on the same wavelength Matt: Who said give me liberty or give me death?
Ryan: Queen-
Matt: Sam… Sam Adams? Ryan: Sam Adams? Matt: Uncle Adams? Ryan: His Uncle Jeremy. Matt: *chuckles* The, uh, famous American hero Uncle Jeremy
Ryan: *laughs* Ryan: He fought for our freedoms WITHOUT guns! Ryan: He used, he used, he used slingshots. Matt: He used a little slingshot with pebbles. Ryan: I wish I wish instead of guns in America It was like slingshots.
Matt: *giggle* Ryan: *imitating yelling American* Come on! We have the right to own slingshots as Americans. Matt: *Southern American accent* It’s my god-given right to bear my slingshot!
Ryan: *laughs* Yeah like that! Matt: This is crazy.
Ryan: Oh my god-
Matt: What’s going on? Ryan: I don’t know, how do I fly forward? Can I fly around?
Matt: He’s like- M: *screaming* JESUS, HELP! Ryan: *laughing* Can I fly around? R: I don’t… Matt: Come on, dude M: Dude, nice! Ryan: Oh my god. What is this crazy shit-
Matt: Dude hes gonna like- M: -go to fast and smash his jaw. Ryan: Gimme those bananas! Matt: You got him!
Ryan: No!
Matt: Oh shit. Ryan: *screaming* NOOO! Matt: You didn’t lose health though, there’s no fall damage, right? *Ryan whimpers in desperation* …no.. Matt: You’re stuck over here now though aren’t you? Ryan: Unless I do this Both: *laughing* Ryan: This this game is nothin’ but collecting, I feel. Its just one big collecting- *talking over each other*
Matt: Yeah, that’s how I feel too. Ryan: I mean, that’s fine.
Matt: When do we unlock ANTIFA column? Ryan: You know whats right here?
Matt: What’s right here? Ryan: I can- I can power slam that-
you ready for this shit?
Matt: *talking over Ryan* Hey look at that little llama Matt: Yeah.
Ryan: Watch this- Matt: Smack that bottlecap…what’d I watch?
Ryan: Uhm… Matt: Did you just make a fool of yourself? Matt: I hope Ryan Magee-
[Ryan interjecting trying to defend himself]
-that you didn’t just make a fool of yourself- Ryan: Oh…
Matt: -infront of all of our viewers.
Ryan: I did it, I did it. Ryan: Oh..Oh!
Matt: ….oh shit. Matt: Whoa..
Ryan: Woo! Matt: What? This is crazy dude! *one of them sniffs snot back into their nasal passages*
Ryan: *whispers* okay… Matt: Okay. Both: *screaming in terror*
Ryan: *temper tantrum like* NO!
*cry coughs, whimper cries* Matt: *scream cries* Ryan: *yells* Agaaaiiin! Matt: Yeah, dude. That’d be so much fun.
Ryan: You could even try this if you want. Matt: Give it here. Ryan: I got the first one. Oh I need to disconnect this.
Matt: Alright, what’s the, uh, button? Ryan: Uh, A.
Matt: Just A?
Ryan: Yeah. Matt: See that?
Ryan: Matt, you’re doing this Ryan: Ooo!
Matt: Uh oh!
Ryan: Come on Matt get this for me? *Matt scream laughing* Ryan: *yelling at Matt* Give it here, GIVE IT HERE!
Matt: I’m sorry. I’m sorry.
Ryan: *giggling* I got that mad- *giggling Matt: *imitating Ryan* GIVE IT HERE! *laughs*
Ryan: *laughing* Matt: You sound like an angry father *chuckles*
Ryan: I feel like there’s something good at the end of this Matt: There’s got to be something good. Man. They wouldn’t do this for nothing Ryan: Okay, you can take turns.
Matt: Yeah. We’ll take turns man Matt: The winner gets a prize
Ryan: *breathing quickly, ape-like* Matt: What’s the winner get?
Ryan: Chicken dinner. Matt: The winner gets a kiss from, uhh… M: We’ll, we’ll find someone on Craigslist to come, to kiss
Ryan: Oh shit, dude Matt: Dude, you get the Craigslist kiss
Ryan: *laughs* Matt: That was a Star of David too, you just flew into a big Star of David Ryan: *whispering* I unlocked him Matt: A Star of Jewish.
Ryan: Oh shit…wait.
Matt: *reading dialogue over Ryan in racially ambiguous accent* Ryan: -didn’t you read something in the-in a walkthrough its like once you unlock the llama you can…
Matt: Uhm… Ryan: Oh, shit, where’s he going? Ryan: *inhaling in surprise*
Matt: *unintelligible* Ryan: There’s a big- Oh, yeah, it gives me a banana!
Matt: The golden banana Ryan: I can go collect my big golden banana and enter that-
Matt: Yeahhh
Ryan: Oh, and there’s- Duuude Matt: Headphones!
Ryan: Headphones, also there’s a balloon I saw floating around up here
Matt: Look at all these huge collectibles, man Matt: You’ve so many coconuts. I’m going crazy right now.
Ryan: I got my coconut gun, quick snipe! Fuck. *both laughing* Matt: Oh man… Matt: You know what sucks… uh… Matt: Justin the guy who has to edit our best dubs, you know it really sucks M: He has to watch every one of our videos. Ryan: I was talking to him about that Matt: He has to-, so he’s watching this right now. Ryan: I think he’s going crazy Matt: Like, he- that-that- just has to be- Ryan: Hey Justin put this in the best of you won’t- R: -pussy
Matt: He’s a pussy- but start with the start with the part where Ryan showed you the quick snipe, that was that was actually pretty funny Ryan: Yeah start with that part, and then you can end the part here. There we made your editing easier you stupid fuck- Matt: There you go Justin stop asking us, stop messaging us editing questions all the time-
Ryan: Fuck… Matt: -just, just, you never learn if you don’t try on your own all right? Matt: God, he’s frustrating,
Ryan: He keeps photoshopping me on like anime girls and sending it to me which is weird Matt: He’s got a confederate flag in his room. It’s really big into the heritage thing.
Ryan: I saw that, yeah Matt: I thought it was a-
Ryan: I thought it was a joke Ryan: Yeah, but he but he’s like- I shouldn’t have done this. I wanna cancel, I don’t want to do this Ryan: I don’t wanna play the bongos.
Matt: Why did you play the bongos?
Ryan: I didn’t mean to – it’s an accident! Relax.
Matt: God dude. Ryan: I’ve got this
Matt: You got it brother
Ryan: Where does this lead to? Ryan: Zipper me timbers!
Matt: *laughs* Matt: Now that’s a funny “Let’s Play” episode title.
Ryan: Zipper me-
Matt: Zipper me timbers?
Ryan: *laughs* Matt: Call this one “Zipper Me Timbers” Ryan. Please?
Ryan: Only for you Ryan: Where is-
Matt: For your old friend Matt? I like it Ryan: Oh shit. I’m scared. I dont wanna-
Matt: Run away from it. Ryan: Oh fuck! *screams* Ahh! Matt: It gotcha! Ryan: It’s because whenever like I’ve tried to turn the camera I accidentally do that shit Matt: You got it bro.
Ryan: Where am I going? Matt: Ryan I would kill for some Vegemite right now, man Ryan: You’re really into that aren’t you?
Matt: It’s so good. I just had it, like for the first time recently, like properly Matt: I had it in that mail opening video, and you squeezed it in my mouth, in like a large quantity M: -and it was disgusting.
Ryan: Is it better than Nutella? Ryan: Is it better than honey?
Matt: TBH I like it better than Nutella, it’s- it’s a different… type. Ya know- M: It’s savory and you put it in a very small quantity on some toast with some butter Ryan: Are you sure it’s not like that thing where it’s like you have something new that’s really good R: but it has to take a while to get into the ranks of like, is it better than this or that? Matt: Yeah- Ryan: I think is like whenever. I have a dip, I’m like R: “Oh, this is the greatest thing I’ve ever had!” And I wear it out, and then I’m like-
Matt: Yeah, Ryan: And I can then I can, kind of-
Matt: You know what if I had just had Nutella for the first time M: I probably would think it’s like the best thing ever,
Ryan: Yeah M: But I don’t really, like- When’s the last time- I rarely eat Nutella. Matt: You know?
It’s just so sweet, but Vegemite is- I love it, like people love it or hate it M: I think it’s really good
Ryan: *announcer style* Love it or hate it, Matt Watson loves it. It’s Vegemite! Matt: I love Vegemite dude! Vegemite should use me as a uhh.. that’s like a little like M: advertising piece.
Ryan: DUDE! Their sales would go up three thousand fold!
Matt: Everyone would be like “oh my god M: I have to buy Vegemite now because Matt, Matt Watson is from super mega is promoting it” Matt: Damn dude look at him dancing!
Ryan: He was bowin’.
Matt: He was, he was, he was bowing just for us, Ryan. Ryan: *southern accent, crying* Just for us, baby.
Matt: We should have clapped for him. We should have made him feel good about himself M: Why didn’t we?
Ryan: Because we’re assholes?
Matt: We are assholes. We’re seriously assholes man. No way around it. Ryan: That’s our…That’s R: What we are guys R: We’re nothing but a couple of buttholes!
Matt: Nothing but assholes. That’s us! Ryan: We should have a show called “Nothing But Buttholes”
Matt: And what would the show be? Ryan: It’s it’s just about our life Ryan: but it’s just called “Nothing But Buttholes.”
Matt: Oh, I thought it was actually gonna be nothing but buttholes. Ryan: *laughing* *speaking over each other*
Matt: Like, the show is just buttholes like over and over.
Ryan: Fuck this stupid fucker! Matt: Man what are the odds you-
*speaking over each other*
Ryan: I fuck myself?
M: You masturbate to completion while we’re recording this “Let’s Play” Ryan: Fuuu- Wrong one! And then I have to sit through this whole thing! Ryan: All I wanted to do, was pull out my gun-
Matt: Whoa dude take it easy!
Ryan: *laughing* Matt: Take it easy man. *Italian(?) accent* Take it easy Matt: This is not the answer. Ryan: Ready?
Matt: Hit it dude. Ryan: There *inhale of suprise*
Matt: Uh ohhhh Ryan: This is gonna be a fun fun temple full of fun fun.
Matt: This temple is gonna be so full of fun Matt: Uh, that it’s, gonna-
Ryan: You can’t you can’t even contain yourself. DUDE!
Matt: I can’t dude. Is that Lanky Kong? Ryan: He’s sexy as hell.
Matt: *reading dialogue over Ryan* Ryan: *reading dialogue* “Whoa there can you come in here and fuck me?” YES. Matt: That’s my favorite part of the game. Ryan: *laughing* You get to go in and fuck Lanky Kong?
Matt: Yeah *giggling* Ryan: Yeah, is he just- is he just down here? Matt: He spreads his little bottoms- Ryan: Where is he? I can’t see shit cuz of the camera.
Matt: Get that little purple crocodile dog thing out of here. Ryan: Can I not? Ryan: Oh, I think- I don’t think I can- hold on… *crinkling plastic* Ryan: What’s this dude?
*monkey in game screams* Ryan: Yeah, what that do?
Matt: I heard a chimp scream. Matt: One of my favorite sound effects.
Ryan: And this is located next to Funky Kong.
Matt: Next to number 4
Ryan: *laughing* Ryan: Got it…
Matt: “Next to number 15,” You know I’m drinking water through a water bottle right now M: And I’m not- I’m not even, I have not even taken the cap off M: That’s a riddle for the viewers how am I, how am I- look.
Ryan: How are you doing it? Matt: Drank water without taking the cap off.
Ryan: Can they answer this riddle? Matt: Leave your comments now M: You have 30 seconds to type and post your comments, and then you’ll see if you’re right.
Ryan: *high pitched nasally voice* “Riddle me this assholes!” Matt: Don’t go cheating. Don’t go typing- M: Don’t go typing it afterwards to look smart. Spank his bum bum!
Ryan: Spanking his bum bum.
Matt: Spank his little bum bum! Ryan: Okay, fuck you, dude. You don’t wanna even- He’s not paying me any attention after I saved him. Matt: He ain’t paying you no mind, dude.
Ryan: This camera is really taking me for a spin. Matt: Ah, jeez Ryan! M: You fell in the lava, and you’re perfectly fine!
Ryan: Watch this. Ryan: *low pitched* Oooohhh
*high pitched* Oooohhhh Ryan: Now what? Now what? What you gonna do son?
Matt: It’s gonna jump in the lava. Ryan: He’s gonna spit in there and make it water? R: That’s awesome. That makes sense. Thank you Matt: dude, oh- Ryan: *inhale in surprise* Oh shit!
Matt: Are you gonna swim down there? Ryan: *still in disbelief* Oh fuck yeah I’m gonna swim down there Matt: Your’e gonna swim, better put on your better put on your baggies! Ryan: Watch this dude is gonna be so epic!
Matt: Put on your swim trunks! M: Your swim shorts, your bathing suit! So many names for it.
Ryan: Okay. Now. I need to, that’s how I go down- Matt: Ah, It’s a fluid
Ryan: *whispering* Okay… Ryan: Here we go.
Matt: Here you go, bro Matt: What? There he is!
Ryan: Oh dude!
Matt: Hi Lanky!, Or, uh, yeah Lanky. Ryan: Don’t go down there Donkey Kong.
Matt: He’s like “Where you going? This is the part where you fuck me.”
Ryan: *laughing* Matt: Do you see after, I want what he looks like without his overalls Ryan: *giggles* Ryan: Look at him, dude.
Matt: *says “HELLO” in his impression of Lanky Kong” Ryan: We’re gonna fuck him now!
Matt: It’s time dude!
Ryan: Isn’t this your favorite character? Matt: Uhh..yeah, he is, I love how goofy is. He freaks me out a little bit, but-
Ryan: Come and find me in the tag barrel *long censor bleep* *both laughing hysterically*

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  1. Today my English teacher asked the class, who is your favorite comedian? I raised my hand and loud and proud said "Matthew Watson and Ryan Magee". Everybody in the room shed a tear. Stunning.

  2. By using previous evidence of Funny YouTube Star Matt Watson of SuperMega drinking water, it can be deduced that he put a hole in the top of the cap to allow water to squirt out the bottle whilst the top still being on.

  3. The cap was loose on the bottle so he could suck the cap end and squeze the bottle so water would dispense out from the bottom of the ajar cap and into his mouth allowing him to consume the water. You can clearly hear him moan with his mouth occupied by the girth of the whole bottle cap end of the bottle.

  4. Matt is secretly a half-man, half-mosquito hybrid who is able to use his long proboscis to pierce the water bottle and drink it without taking off the lid
    Pretty simple

  5. hey Matt ive been listening to Bloo for a week straight! this song is amazing and i cant wait to hear your next pick 🙂

  6. I
    m going to load up my Kong and smoke some sweet sweet bananas, ya know what I'm saying my brothers? gurgle gurgle gurgle Hah.

  7. Sup girls, boys, and every other gender in between. Small YouTube channel here. I hate doing this kind of stuff but there's really no other way to kind of get attention, but we're a lot like SuperMega if you're interested in a shittier watered down SuperMega. Been working OT lately so it's been awhile since the last episode BUT next week we'll have a few more episodes up like Mario Kart 8, Far Cry 5, Zelda etc and more to come in time. If you're interested in something like that, we'd be so happy, really only interested in recognition and respect. If you like it maybe give us a little sub, and if you don't you can dislike it, really anything is appreciated.

  8. i'm cringing so hard. This is my favorite game from my childhood. Enjoying watching though! Please finish this! 😮

  9. “We’ll find someone on Craigslist to kiss”

    Not anymore you won’t, the personals section was removed because the government thought that would impact sex trafficking(it won’t)

  10. I had an uncle Jeremy who cheated on his wife, glad to hear that he is a slingshot wielding American hero

  11. He popped a little hole in the lid in the top to drink from the bottle, or the bottle is leaking from under the lid

  12. just saying i found you guys after arin trashed talked you and you had that editing short where you caught him in the after the fact

  13. Here's a riddle:

    I have no style, I have no grace,
    but I'm a Kong with a funny face.
    I can handstand when I need to,
    and I can stretch my arms out just for you.
    I can inflate myself just like a balloon.
    I'm a crazy Kong who just digs his tune.
    Who am I?

  14. School shootings would be a lot less heartbreaking if we used slingshots instead of guns.


    They growl like dogs, sound like dying puppies when hurt… Of course they're dogs!

    no u moronz he was dabbing OBVS.

    You can see DK's butt.

    YAY! LANKY! My favorite Kong in the game!

    He actually said: "Who's there?"

    A small hole on the cap.

    Hot water burns just like fire!

    His spit has massive cooling properties!

    Let's hope he's wearing underwear under those pants.

    He sounds so adorable!!


  15. Vegemite is my life as a child all I ate was vegemite sandwich’s and I maybe had an eating disorder thank you bye

  16. Number 15:
    Burger king foot lettuce. The last thing you'd want in your Burger King burger is someone's foot fungus. But as it turns out, that might be what you get.

  17. my favorite thing is when they make a joke and bleep it out and laugh about it so we can all laugh along with them at the joke only they're in on…great…hilarious

  18. God damn, they got their first banana in the Aztec level 6 minutes into the video. This series would have been 1000 parts if they finished it.

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