Mark Wahlberg Has Heard Worse Than Your Bad Boston Accent
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Mark Wahlberg Has Heard Worse Than Your Bad Boston Accent

August 16, 2019


LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, YOU KNOW
MY FIRST GUEST FROM “THE DEPARTED,” “TED,” AND THE
“TRANSFORMER” MOVIES. HIS LATEST IS “MILE 22.” PLEASE WELCOME BACK TO “THE
LATE SHOW,” MARK WAHLBERG! ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪ ♪ ♪ ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>>Stephen: WELCOME BACK! NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN.>>THANKS FOR HAVING ME. HOW ARE YOU.>>Stephen: I’M GOOD. HOW HAS YOUR SUMMER BEEN?>>IT’S BEEN GOOD.>>Stephen: WHAT DO YOU DO FOR
FUN SOME WHAT’S YOUR SUMMERTIME JAM?>>I’M DOING A MOVIE, I’M WAKING
UP AT 3:00, WORKING OUT, DOING ALL MY PRAYERS, PLAYING GOLF–
TRYING TO GET ALL THAT DONE BEFORE THE KID AND MY WIFE WAKE
UP, WHICH IS NOT AN EASY THING TO DO. THEN I START THE REST OF MY DAY.>>Stephen: I THOUGHT BEING A
MOVIE STAR IT’S GLAMOROUS, ALL JUST PARTIES AND BOATS.>>FOR A LOT OF GUYS IT IS. FOR THE OVERACHIEVER, YOU HAVE
TO GET UP A LITTLE EARLY, BUT I’M OKAY WITH THAT. I DON’T MIND WORKING HARD. IT’S PAYING OFF.>>Stephen: LIFE IS SUFFERING.>>NO COMPLAINTS.>>Stephen: NO COMPLAINT? HOW MANY KIDS?>>FOUR, TWO BOYS AND TWO GIRL
S.>>Stephen: TWO BOYS AND TWO
GIRLS. EVERYTHING IS BALANCED. RECENT HEADLINE IN LOCAL BOSTON
NEWS, “MARK WAHLBERG SEEKING TOUGH BOSTON MOB GUYS FOR
UPCOMING FILM.” I HAVEN’T GOTTEN A CALL, MARK. WHAT’S THE… DID YOU LOSE MY
AGENT’S NUMBER? WHAT’S–
>>I DIDN’T, BUT I ACTUALLY, JUST LOOKING AT YOU NOW, I THINK
YOU WOULD MAKE FOR THE PERFECT WHITE COLLAR CRIMINAL.>>Stephen: WHY, THANK YOU
VERY MUCH.>>SO YOU AND I.>>Stephen: YES.>>IN JAIL.>>Stephen: YOU AND ME IN JAIL
TOGETHER.>>I’M ASKING YOU FOR FINANCIAL
ADVICE. JUST THE WAY YOU ARE, GLASSES,
WORKING IN THE LIBRARY. BUT YOU ACTUALLY ARE VERY SMART. AND WE’RE GOING TO PULL OFF A
PONZI SCHEME WHEN YOU GET OUT OF JAIL.>>Stephen: OH, I LIKE TI LIKE
IT.>>AND THEN YOU DECIDE —
>>Stephen: BECAUSE YOU’RE THE MUSCLE AND I’M THE BRAINS.>>LISTEN, I KNOW A LOT OF GUYS
–>>Stephen: IF YOU’RE THE
BRAINS AND THE MUSCLE THEN I AM THE MUSCLE AND HIGH BODY FAT.>>NEVER UNDERESTIMATE ANYBODY. I KNOW A LOT OF GUYS 125 POUNDS
WHO WILL BEAT THE (BLEEP) OUT OF MOST BIG GUY, BUT THEY ARE
HOPPED UP ON DRUGS. SO IF WE GIVE YOU THE RIGHT
AMOUNT OF METHAMPHETAMINE –>>Stephen: GIVE ME THE STUFF
LIKE, COPS TASE THEM FIVE TIMES AND IT DOESN’T FAZE THEM AT ALL. THAT’S MY CHARACTER HOOK RIGHT
THERE. HERE’S WHY I’D BE AFRAID TO
AUDITION FOR YOUR BOSTON MOB MOVIE. AS YOU KNOW, BOSTON ACCEPT IS
THE HARDEST THING FOR ACTORS TO PULL OFF. PEOPLE HAVE FAMOUSLY SHANKED,
THAT ONE.>>YES, I WILL NOT NAME NAMES. SOME PEOPLE WISELY AVOID THE
ACCENT.>>Stephen: THEY’RE FROM
BOSTON AND DO THIS?>>YES, THEY TALK NORMAL.>>Stephen: HI, I’M FROM
BOSTON. HOW DO YOU LIKE THEM APPLES?>>I’VE HEARD WORSE.>>Stephen: YOU’VE HEARD
WORSE? YOU’VE HEARD WORSE.>>I HAVE WITNESSED WORSE.>>Stephen: IS THERE A PHRASE
YOU CAN GIVE ME FOR THE HOOK. WHAT DO I DO TO SOUND LIKE I’M
FROM BOSTON OR DO I SCREAM, “I HATE THE YANKEES.”>>THAT ALWAYS WORKS. NOW THAT WE’RE IN FIRST PLACE
YOU DON’T HAVE TO HATE THE YANKEES. NO DISRESPECT. THE YANKEES HAVE 27
CHAMPIONSHIPS. NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT. YOU’RE STILL GOING TO MAKE THE
WILD CARD. RELAX, GUYS. THEY HAVE THE SECOND-BEST RECORD
IN THE LEAGUE, AND THESE GUYS ARE STILL COMPLAINING.>>Stephen: SPEAK OF CASTING. YOU CAST YOUR MOM IN THE REALITY
SHOW “WALL BURGERS” RIGHT HERE. HERE’S SOME OF THE PAST. THERE’S YOU. THERE’S YOUR BROTHER, PAUL,
THERE’S YOUR MOM, ALMA. THERE’S YOUR BROTHER, DONNY. WHICH OF THE WAHLBERGS GET THE
BIGGEST TRAILER?>>THERE IS NO TRAILER ON THIS
PARTICULAR SHOW, BUT MY MOTHER IS THE ONLY ONE WHO GETS A PAY
INCREASE WITH EVERY SEASON. AND SHE SHOULD. BIT YOU KNOW WHAT? SHE DIDN’T WANT TO DO THE SHOW. HER AND MY BROTHER PAUL WERE
LIKE, “ABSOLUTELY NOT.” THEY THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO DO
CRAZY, NEGATIVE, WE FIGHT ALL TIME REALITY SHOW. I JUST WANTED TO DO A SHOW TO
BUILD THE BUSINESS, WHICH IT HAS DONE BECAUSE WE HAVE 27 STORES
OPEN –>>Stephen: 27?>>WE WILL OPEN ANOTHER 10 THIS
YEAR. IF I TELL HER, “I DON’T THINK
WE’RE GOING TO DO ANOTHER SEASON,” IT’S LIKE DEAD SILENCE. AND THEN IT’S LIKE, WHAT, AM I
GOING TO DO? WHERE AM I GOING TO GET MONEY?”
I’M LIKE, “YOU’RE ANOTHER MOM.” IT’S ACTUALLY GIVEN HER A LOT OF
JOY, AND NOW SHE’S FAMOUS ON HER OWN, SO SHE’S NOT LIVING IN MY
BROTHER’S SHADOW ANYMORE.>>Stephen: SHE DOESN’T NEED
YOU ANYMORE.>>NO.>>Stephen: SHE’S GOING TO CUT
YOU GUYS LOOSE.>>SHE’S PUT ME IN MY PLACE MANY
A TIME.>>Stephen: HAS SHE PUT YOU IN
YOUR PLACE RECENTLY?>>NOT TOO RECENTLY. BUT WORST AND MOST EMBARRASSING,
SHE DOESN’T FLY ANYMORE, BUT I BROUGHT HER TO CALIFORNIA, AND
SHE WANTED TO LEAVE EARLY. THEY DRIVE HOME, AND THE LIMO
DRIVER GETS LOST FOR, LIKE, 5 MINUTES. AND I WALK IN THE DOOR AND SHE’S
LIKE WHO ( BLEEP )? WHO DO YOU (BLEEP) THINK YOU
ARE? YOU’RE NOT A MOVIE STAR. I SAID WHAT HAPPENED? SHE SAID WE GOT LOST. I SAID YOU WERE IN A LIMOUSINE
WITH THE PRIEST. NO PROBLEM.>>Stephen: WAS THE PRIEST
THERE WHILE SHE WAS “F-“BOMBING?>>YES, WITH THE BIGGEST GRIN
WAITING FOR ME TO SEND HER TO BED SO WE COULD HAVE SOME WINE
AND LAUGHS. HE DROPS MORE “F” BOMBS THAN ME.>>Stephen: HAVE YOU THOUGHT
OF CASTING YOUR MOM AS A TOF BOSTON MOB GUY?>>I AM BASING MY CHARACTER ON
MY MOTHER. ( APPLAUSE ).>>Stephen: IN CASE– THIS
IS– I FIND THIS FASCINATING. I GOTTA GET TO THE BOTTOM OF
THIS NEXT ONE. IN CASE THE MOVIE CAREER, THE
PRODUCING CAREER, THE BURGER JOINTS, IN CASE THAT ALL GOES
SOUTH, YOU’VE GOT A BACKUP PLAN NOW. I UNDERSTAND THAT YOU HAVE–
YOU’VE BOUGHT A CHEVY DEALERSHIP IN COLUMBUS, OHIO. ( LAUGHTER ).>>YES.>>Stephen: ARE YOU– ARE YOU
PLANNING TO GO INTO THE WITNESS RELOCATION PROGRAM? ( LAUGHTER )
WHY– WHY– WHY COLUMBUS? I KNOW WHY CHEVY. CHEVY MAKES A FINE VEHICLE. THEY SPONSOR US, RIGHT? ( LAUGHTER )
YES. THEY MAKE A FINE VEHICLE.>>BEST.>>Stephen: THE BEST. OH, MY GOD.>>ONE OF THE GREAT AMERICAN
BRANDS OF ALL TIME.>>Stephen: OF COURSE.>>LISTEN, I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN A
LOVER OF CARS. I DROVE A TOW TRUCK. I WORKED AS A MECHANIC. I USED TO DO OIL CHANGES, TUNE
UPS. I LOVE THE AUTOMOBILE INDUSTRY. I LOVE BEING IN COLUMBUS. WE’RE ABOUT TO OPEN A
WAHLBERGERS THERE. WE’RE ALREADY IN CLEVELAND. AND WE HAVE BEST DEALS. NOW I KNOW–
( LAUGHTER ) LET ME JUST EXPLAIN SOMETHING TO
YOU –>>Stephen: ALL RIGHT, YOU
HAVE THE BEST DEALS–>>LISTEN.>>Stephen: I’LL TELL YOU WHAT
I WANT. OKAY, PUT ME IN A CHEVY
SILVERADO 1500, MARK WAHLBERG. COME ON, SELL ME.>>NOW, YOU SAY YOU WANT THAT. BUT I ASSESSED YOU THE SECOND
YOU WALKED IN. YOU’RE NOT GOING TO BUY A NEW
CAR FOR THE REST OF THE BAND. YOU’RE LOOKING FOR A USED
EQUINOX, LT, ONE OWNER, LOW MILE AS —
>>Stephen: CHEVY EQUINOX. WHAT’S THE TORQUE?>>I’M GOING TO THROW IN A
NAVISTAR NAVIGATION PACKAGE, HEATED SEATS, ALUMINUM WHIELZ,
MAKE AN XM RADIO, A REMOTE START, AND IF YOU’RE LUCKY, I’LL
THROW IN JUST FOR YOU A REAR BACKUP CAMERA. HOMELAND ON —
>>Stephen: ISN’T THAT STANDARD NOW?>>NOT THESE DAYS. $20,904 IS THE BASE PRICE. I KNOW THAT BECAUSE I DO THE
RESEARCH AND YOU DON’T HAVE TO. WHAT I’M GOING TO DO FOR YOU
TODAY, MR. COLBERT, $1,000 DOWN, $294 FOR 84 MONTHS, AND I WILL
THROW IN A GIFT CERTIFICATE FOR A PARTICIPATING WAHLBERGERS, AND
THROW IN TINTED WINDOWS IF YOU MAKE A PURCHASE AT WALL BURGERS
FOR $49 OR MORE. DO WE HAVE A DEAL? DO WE HAVE A DEAL?>>Stephen: IT’S A DEAL, IT’S
A DEAL.>>I’LL GET YOU GUYS A CAR. I’LL GET YOU GUYS A CAR.>>Stephen: IT’S A DEAL.>>THAT’S WHY I’M IN THE CAR
BUSINESS.>>Stephen: I WANT TO GO BACK
TO ONE OF THE THINGS YOU JUST SAID RIGHT THERE, BECAUSE A HELL
OF A SALESMAN JOB– YOU SAID “AT PARTICIPATING WAHLBERGERS.” ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT THERE
ARE SOME WALL BURGERS– AND YOU BEING MARK WAHLBERG– THAT ARE
NOT WILLING TO PARTICIPATE IN THIS PROMOTION FROM MARK
WAHLBERG’S CHEVY DEALERSHIP IN COLUMBUS, OHIO?>>I WOULD SAY THAT IT’S
DEFINITELY A LIMITED OFFER. ( LAUGHTER )
LIMITED TIME. SO I HAVE TO FIGURE OUT —
>>Stephen: UH-HUH, UH-HUH.>>YOU BETTER GET IT BY
TOMORROW.>>Stephen: OKAY, ALL RIGHT. WELL, YOU’RE GOING TO DO FINE AT
THAT DEALERSHIP. YOU’RE GOING TO DO REAL FINE. ( APPLAUSE ).>>Stephen: BUT SERIOUSLY, I
DO WANT A SILVERADO. THE CHEVY SILVERADO. INCREDIBLE VEHICLE. THE NEW MOVIE IS “MILE 22”.>>YES.>>Stephen: WILL I UNDERSTAND
THIS MOVIE IF I HAVEN’T SEEN MILES ONE THROUGH 21?>>YOU WILL ABSOLUTELY. YOU KNOW, IT’S ONE OF THOSE–
PETE BERG AND I WE MADE MOVIES BASED ON REAL-LIFE TRAGEDIES. WE WANTED TO HAVE OUR VERSION OF
FUN. WE CREATED A CHARACTER-DRIVEN
ACTION MOVIE THAT ONCE THE ACTION STARTS —
>>Stephen: WE HAVE RONDA ROUSEY ON, AND SHE HAD A CLIP,
AND BOOM.>>YOU KNOW WHAT’S GREAT ABOUT
RONDA? OBVIOUSLY EVERYBODY EXPECTS HER
TO KICK A LOT OF ASS IN THE MOVIE. HER FANTASTIC PERFORMANCE IS
INCREDIBLE. SHE’S GOING TO HAVE A GREAT
CAREER. BUT THIS MOVIE IS NOT WHAT YOU
EXPECT. YOU’RE GETTING SOMETHING
ORIGINAL AND REALLY SMART. AND I TWIST YOU WOULDN’T EXPECT,
NORMALLY THE GOOD GUYS WIN– YOU’RE GOING TO WANT TO SEE
MORE. YOU’RE GOING TO WANT TO SEE
ANOTHER ONE.>>Stephen: DO YOU KNOW WHAT’S
HAPPENING IN THIS CLIP?>>I HAVE NO IDEA BUT LET’S SEE
IT.>>Stephen: LET’S FIND OUT.>>WE’RE SURROUNDED AND NEED
HELP.>>ALICE, GO! BACKUP! BACKUP! BACKUP!>>WHAT IS THE STATUS OF THE
PACKAGE?>>Stephen: YEAH. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
YOU KNOW WHAT? AFTER, AFTER THAT EXPLOSION, YOU
KNOW WHAT THEY’RE GOING TO NEED? THEY’RE GOING TO NEED A NEW
CHEVY IS WHAT THEY’RE GOING TO NEED.>>EXACTLY.>>Stephen: WELL, MARK, GOOD
TO SEE YOU AGAIN.>>THANK YOU VERY MUCH.>>Stephen: CONGRATULATIONS ON
THE DEALERSHIP. “MILE 22” IS IN THEATERS THIS
FRIDAY. MARK WAHLBERG, EVERYBODY!

Only registered users can comment.

  1. The Boston accent is not hard at all. There isn’t a single actor/actress that can do an New Orleans accent unless he/she is from New Orleans. Every person that attempts the New Orleans accent sounds line he/she is from Texas and we sounds nothing like them people!!!

  2. I abhor the idea of dealerships. It’s 2019. Stop the lobbyist and cut off the snakes that make up a ridiculously stupid middle man. Nothing but crooks.

  3. Mark is just an awesome shark ❤. What a deal he gave to Mr. Colbert LOL… Gotta love his personality and movies.

  4. Mark Wahlberg would assault Asians and blacks in Boston years ago before he became famous tried to get his record expunged but I know in a lot of people eyes he's this great actor what he did can't be excused swept under the rug he's a terrible human being f*** Mark Wahlberg

  5. Mark , you are forever selling or buying cars , I saw you on Ellen’s show with whom you share a business selling cars. You ‘re cool man.

  6. Crazy mark is talking about doing meth and doing drugs to get jacked… Considering he is a part of wme-img

  7. Mark is such a class act and sweetheart, good dad and Christian. He does a lot for Mass.
    Being from Mass my entire life, you hear shit NE accents all the time, but really good ones that are natural can escape your notice. I JUST realized that Family Guy characters have thick RI accents. Growing up, I heard it so often, it didn't even strike me that the rest of the country heard something different.

    I love hearing shit Boston accents. It makes us all laugh our asses off.

  8. We grew up together and Its been a long time.. He's a cool person when you acualy meet him.. Fynny as hell.. Lol

  9. The limo story alone is its own movie. TAKE MY MONEY!!!!!! Also, I want Joy Behart or Bette Midler to play his mom, for some reason. tehehehehe

  10. Ted 1 and 2 is funny as fuck. Love that Bear. I Love U. LOL nice
    Transformers Age Of Extinction, The Last Knight awesome.

  11. 🎵Happy Birthday ✌ U WHOO
    Happy Birthday ✌ U WHOO
    Happy Birthday Dear Mark WHOO
    Happy Birthday ✌ U🎵 WHOOOO Happy Birthday Mark and May The Peace Be With U. June 5, 1971
    June 5, 2019 – June 5, 3019

  12. 1. Colbert needs to stop trying to talk over his guests all the time – They must get so frustrated
    2. Mark, try cracking a smile at least once – You look like a stuck up Dick in this interview.
    3. Rhonda Rousey is going to have a great acting career?

  13. I like how Stephen Colbert's audience is full of politically correct SJW's that will call for the execution of people like Louis CK or James Franco for getting accused by the MeToo movement of doing basically nothing. But they stand and clap for Wahlburg who is a confirmed former racist that beat an old asian man until he was blind in one eye. Im not saying Wahlburg doesnt deserve redemption, what im saying is this guy has done something that could easily get him cancelled and boycotted by the modern SJW movement but he just hasnt been called out yet. Yet other people who have sinned far less will get demonized by these same SJW's who clap for someone who hasnt been called out. Shows you how these people move and behave as a mob, completely brainless. Just trying to uphold the PC movement at all costs

  14. Mark seems like the type of guys who'll break your legs if you don't sign up for a 5yr lease on a Chevy Volt.

  15. The worst actor. Seriously. Zero charisma. Just a meat head. This guy is vanilla ice with out the talent. He was the Justin Bieber of his era.

  16. How does he wear a watch over his cuff sleeve i cant get mine to fit i sometimes i dont wear a watch. I like short sleeves i wish i could go to wahlburgers. I will Google' it ok have a nice day

  17. Mark Wahlberg can go to hell. https://action.18mr.org/wahlberg/ I hope everybody knows that he's a racist piece of trash who attacked an asian man while yelling racial slurs at him.

  18. Mark Wahlberg is a cold-blooded criminal with a huge rap sheet. The man blinded one of his victims during a robbery and only did 45 days. It pays to be the elites in America.

  19. Mark use to be listed as part German. Now the German is gone and he is Swedish now. Even in one of his movies the dialogue says…".What is a nice German-Irish boy yada yada ……"

  20. What a condescending douchebag Colbert is , he is like that allot , little subtle digs at the guests

  21. I couldn’t care less for this conceited asshole and that clever shade he threw at Donnie just made my eyes roll as usual any time he opens his mouth.
    His burgers are even less remarkable than his acting career.

  22. He says market price is 20,194 and he's going to offer the special price of 1000 down and 249/mo for 84 months but thats 21916….

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