Articles

Twilight Princess Part 1 – Rear Shower Horse Power – Karibukai Play

August 21, 2019


S
Look at that beautiful field. What is this world, Dan?
It’s so… beautiful. And pixelated. D
Did we start? S
I don’t know, you tell me! D
Are we starting right now!? S
Yes! Yes. D
Hello everybody and welcome! We started, I guess. S
Yes. I was trying to be all in character and
whatnot… but you ruined it. D
In character. HA! S
Yes. Of like… I am D
HA! S
The new Link or whatever D
Method actor, over here. S
Yeah. D
Oh, you’re Link? Then you need to STOP TALKING. S
Jesus Christ, man. D
*WOLF NOISES* S
We’re playing Zelda! Twilight Princess. D
It’s Twilight Princess. This is the Gamecube
version. S
OOoooOOOoooo…uhh press start D
Ooo! S
So… what are we… what our we naming our
child? D
You wanted it to be Poki again. S
No, well, I-I changed my mind, I don’t want
it to be “Poki” D
I thought “Liar” was kinda funny. (Laughter) S
Umm… uhh… Let’s see… D
When we get around to naming Epona, like, I will really force my hand on that one. S
“Liar?” D
No. S
Or, what you want it to be to be named? D
For Epona, uh… For Link, uhh… I mean,
We can fight about it, but… like… I’m fine with losing that fight. D
What is this? (sighs) Kink. (Laughter) D
I… (sigh) Why am I gonna say no? S
Uh… I dunno. It’s Kink. Oh, crap. Uhhh… I dunno. D
We’re taking too long S
Ok, his name is Roop. D
Roop… (sigh) Shoop Da Woop S
Rooo roo… Roopeeeeee. Roopee. D
That’s fine. S
End Oh dang. D
MY BUTT. S
Do you want to spell it exactly like that? My Butt? Or…? D
My Oh. Let’s do one of these. S
My. Butt. End. Uuuhhhh… What… D
This is where we just– S
Oh. Are we supposed to do it on the actual
tv screen? D
Yeah. It’s one of those. S
(HEAVY SIGH) D
I gotta pick up the remote controller. S
Nope, wrong one… picture settings… brightness… D
This is *so* riveting. S
Wee! And you guys can’t see anything! Uhhhhhhh… D
I like that. Do that. Do that. Do that. Do that. S
That? Ok. Exit. D
If you guys wanna be winners, change your
brightness to 85. S
Whatever that is on your tv. D
SHUT UP! IT’S STARTING!>:( S
Eck, eugh, ek… S
(Reads dialog aloud) S
The only time we can feel the lingering spirits who have left our world. (Reads dialog aloud) S
That is why your mother left us. D
(sings) ♪ Hello darkness, my old friend ♪ (chuckles) S
(Reads dialog aloud) D
Oh! He’s looking right at me. I’m blushing
so hard, right now. (*´∀`*) S
(Reads dialog aloud) I’m just a lazy ass. (Reads dialog aloud) D
Ooohhh, don’t look at me like that, senpai.
(/ω\) (laughter) S
(Reads dialog aloud) That was a very creative name, don’t you think?
Castle town. D
Oh, Castle town, sure. S
(Reads dialog aloud) D
(Grunts like Link does)
Gyaaa! Hyeh! JEH! CHYEEAA! (laughter) S
(Reads dialog aloud) D
(Continues)
Hoonk HANK! CHE! HYAAAA! (・`ヘ´・;) S
Oh ho My Butt, come, we must go. To the toilet. D
We’re going off to a far away land soon, right? S
I dunno D
How far away is it? S
It’s over in Kansas. D
That’s so far. S
So, so far. It’s, like… D
We’re not there anymore. S
It’s like 15 miles from here. D
When’s the last… when’s the last time you’ve been on vacation? S
Uhhh… July. D
In July? S
It is October now. When we’re recording this. D
Oh, ok. But you didn’t really enjoy yourself
when you went, did you? S
No, I didn’t. I really didn’t. I had a lot of stuff to do while I was there. Um… I
didn’t even do half the stuff I had planned for… Dude, there’s a rainbow! 😀 …That’s not important right now, I guess. D
No. S
But yeah, man. Hopefully Christmas I get to
go on vacation or something. Probably not. D
Um. You know, I made–
I made that jambalaya the other day? S
Yea. (∩❛ڡ❛∩) D
That was really good. That reminded me the
last vacation I went on. Where I enjoyed myself. (laughs) S
The food actually sent you traveling. D
No, I’m not talking about– I went to the
place. Jambalaya. Jambalaya Texas. S
Oh. There’s a place named Jambalaya? D
Yeah. I went to go visit my Uncle Chumlee in Jambalaya Texas. S
Are– Excuse me? Is this (laughing) real?
(laughter) S
Is that a real place? Uncle Chumlee
at Jambalaya Texas? ∠( ᐛ 」∠) (laughter) S
Are you pulling my leg? D
He runs a fireworks store. S
What’s it called? D
Uncle Chumlee’s fireworks. D
You know, it’s one of those place where you– it’s like, buy one, get twelve free? S
(Exasperated) I can’t– I don’t know if you’re
telling me the truth here. (laughter) 😀 Your Uncle Chumlee… D
Well, hey… S
Runs a firework place. In Jambalaya Texas. D
Eh, yeah, I took… Eh, you know, it was about
a year ago– Hey Roopee, you there? D
You mind helpin’ me herd the goats? Oh, this is everybody’s favorite part of this
game. They ain’t listening to me lately. S
I remember playing this. D
Um… Yeah, uh, it was a while back, but… making the jambalaya reminded me of it. I
took my motorcycle… from here and– S
Where’s my butt!? (=´∇`=) (laughter) D
H-Hey! Where’s my butt!? S
Shoulda done a lower case “m.” D
Darn it. You capitalized it for me, I blame you– S
YOU did it! I gave it to you! Woah! We can
move around already! And roll. Woo. Hello, strange man (Reads dialog aloud) (laughter) Where’s ma butt? (laughter) My butt!? This way? (Reads dialog aloud) D
Butt. 〜( ̄▽ ̄〜) S
Oh boy. Such riveting gameplay already. We’re off to find My Butt. Wee. S
Where are we going? D
So, yeah, I visited-I visited him over in Jambalaya Texas. I loaded up the old hog,
the old motorcycle, rode down… S
Now I know you’re just– D
I stayed with him for a few days, he’s, like, “Heyyyy, man. How’s it goin’?
And I’m like, “PSH, whatever, I’m gonna stay here ok? And he’s like, “Sure. Like, what are planning
on doing here when you go… zz…(ο´・д・)? When you get here?” And it’s like (DAN STUTTERING INTENSIFIES) D
I hear that, you know, there’s a good,
like, retro game trading show S
Oohhh. (Shinja channels inner female) O, hai, Roopayyy~ I washed My butt for you! (laughter) S
Ahh, Roopee’s so happy! I’m so glad that he washed… D
And he’s like, “What are ya doin’ with them
video games for?” and I’m like “Well, I still don’t have a virtual boy yet, Uncle Chumlee.” He’s like, “PSH, I have like 12 of those!” S
(Reads dialog aloud) (laughter) S
Why. WHY? WHYYYYYY!? ヽ(゚Д゚)ノ D
Pick up some grasssss. S
Yes, blow that grass. Wait, how… We have the triforce already? S
What the heck? Why do we have the triforce? Oh. Ooo, first person. D
This is the first FPS ever made. S
(Reads aloud) D
(Laughter) Ride her back. S
Yes. D
(MANIACAL LAUGHTER) (Laughter) S
Oh, dear god… Ohhh, spank My Butt! D
That’s– That’s part of the reason why. S
Geez. D
Gotta whip my butt to go faster. S
Uhhh… Ok, the guy’s not here So I guess we’re going this way now. Whatever. D
The goats… S
So, you were saying you were with your uncle
and you said you had no virtual boy… D
Yeah, I mean I’m-I’m I still need a virtual boy. For my collection. It was just a bunch of cardboard boxes with like, dirty magazines that he like,
looked into and he was like “This is virtual reality!” S
(grumbling) S
Wait, he has a virtual boy? D
Yeah. But he–
oh, well, that’s what he thought. S
Ohhh, well what was it, then? D
I just told you. S
It was just a dirty box with… er, a box
with dirty magazines D
No, it was a dirty box
with clean magazines in them. S
Oh, ok. D
You know, like “Parents.” “Parents” magazine
and like “TIME.” S
Who are we supposed to talk to, this guy? (Reads dialog aloud) Uhhh… so… this… I’m going this way. (BEAUTIFUL MUSIC) D
My Butt’s so happy. S
She is so happy. :’D S
Oh, look at that, it’s like– galloping cycle. Wow. I’ve never noticed how odd these goats kinda look. Their horns are oddly shaped. D
Herding these might take a little while, so
perhaps we should save this… S
For the next episode. D
Yeah, for the next one. S
Yeah. such a riveting episode with My Butt. But… D
Butt S
We’ll end it here and continue
on the next episode. D
(laughs) S
Byeee! D
Giddyup! ヾ(⌐■_■)ノ♪(ELECTRONIC MUSIC)ヾ(⌐■_■)ノ♪ ヾ(⌐■_■)ノ♪(ELECTRONIC MUSIC)ヾ(⌐■_■)ノ♪

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